DISCLAIMER because Katie doesn’t want to be associated with my foul language: This entry contains the following language that may be deemed as inappropriate: shit, and shit tank. I apologize for those who would rather it be called black tank or holding tank, but after you’ve spent some time crawling around in shit tanks, looking for cracks, corrosion and inspecting work, you’ll understand why I call it a shit tank. And after reading this, you’ll probably be amazed that my language was not worse.
Well, after a couple weeks of traveling and finally coming back, it was time for the dreaded first shit tank draining evolution. Of course, the gloves were left at the other house, but doodie called and I was itching to experience something new.
I guess my facial expression said it all, because Katie said that she could tell things had gone to shit when I opened the door and said I needed help. Actually, I think my exact words were “I have shit all over my hand”.
Apparently, someone didn’t pay close attention during the walk through nor did he have the common sense to check a key element prior to starting use of the facilities. I now imagine that part of the winterizing process includes opening all the gate valves to the shit tanks because that’s the position I found them in. Of course, I didn’t check the valve position first. You’d think with my background involving many nuclear checklists I’d know better. But, I didn’t. I have a vivid memory of checking the valves at the dealership, and I know now that I didn’t check them, just noticed where the valves were.
So, as you are starting to understand, there were some open valves. Amazingly enough, the little twist-on caps for the sewer lines held back quite a load. After I easily removed the sewer hose from the box and hooked it up to the sewer connection at the site, I thought this would be a piece of cake. Then, I went for the part I was least concerned about, removing the cap on the sewer line. Much to my surprise a little bit (perhaps a little more than a ‘little bit’) of liquid came out. Even more surprising was the awful odor that appeared microseconds after the liquid surged over my hand.
I instantly had flashbacks to the days of crawling around in shit tanks on the boat looking for cracks wondering why someone with no experience inspecting shit tanks had the ultimate responsibility for inspecting and closing them out. I figure it was part of the indoctrination process. I quickly twisted the cap back in place and was grateful that I had taken it slow since it was my first time.
Did I mention I decided to do this at 11:00pm? That’s right, it was dark and I was exhausted. Sounds like fuel for a great critique. I just needed some jackass saying that he didn’t use the procedure. Oh yea, I didn’t. [Sorry that all you ‘non-Navy nukes’ don’t understand that reference. Just imagine doing something wrong and knowing why it was wrong and then discussing the root causes and reasons for something going wrong for a few hours and follow it up with some nice paperwork that gets routed and re-written multiple times. You really need to sit through one to get the full value of this reference.]
Defeated and wreaking shit tank water, I opened the door with my clean hand and told Katie I needed some help. Having no bucket onboard despite hearing recommendations to have one, we had a solution. Katie had the foresight to pick up a trash can that day. She didn’t realize that her impulsive decision would soon save the day.
I was able to get the valves shut and used the trash can to drain the sewage from the piping downstream. I dumped it into the sewer connection and sprayed down the crap on the ground. Thank goodness for the outdoor shower line! Having some experience with sewage leaking during my days on the boat, I also dumped the bleach water used to deodorize the trash on the crap puddle to combat the unsanitary condition.
Making matters a little crappier was the fact that we have two shit tanks with separate drain lines. Yes, shit tanks. There are also 2 grey water tanks off of the forward drain line. Even though I knew the business that had occurred and flushed into the aft tank, I figured that I would empty the drain line since my hands had been properly prepped from the forward tank. Wow, was I right. The aft shit tank was infinitely worse than the front. I think Katie vomited in her mouth a little, but you’d have to ask her. I was glad that I hadn’t discovered this ordeal with the aft tank since by this time I at least had a couple grocery sacks to protect my hand.
After draining the drain lines, I connected the sewer line to the forward drain connection and successfully drained the forward shit tank and grey water tanks. I left the aft for later. Today was later and it was still awful, but I was thankful that I decided to clear downstream portion of piping the other night. This time it was only the odor that was terrible and the liquid was gone. I was armed with gloves this time which restored some of my confidence.
In the end, I was glad that this occurred at night. It saved some embarrassment from passersby and gave Katie a great chance to perform at her favorite job…holding a flash light during the best circumstances ever. She never seems to figure out where to point it no matter how many times I require flash light assistance. I doubt that her constant gagging helped her to hold it steady. I was proud that she didn’t vomit. After seeing her weak shit-tank-odor gag reflex, I doubt that she would survive many duty days on the boat.
So, for those of you who may read this, I have made you a list of things to remember:
1. DO NOT put a load in a shit tank or any tank unless you check the drain valve position.
2. DO NOT attempt to drain shit tanks without gloves.
3. DO have a bucket onboard at all times because you never know when the shit will hit the fan.
4. DO be prepared for the crappiest scenario possible.
I hope you enjoyed my great experience. For the RV dealers out there who can’t believe that first timers get such a large rig, please remember to be thorough on the walk thru. And for those out there who asked if we had dealt with draining the tanks yet, I hope that my first experience didn’t let you down. ;) And to Katie, I hope you’re not too embarrassed that I posted this for all to see :)
-Steve
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